Sometimes, the way I treat life now really freaks me out... Its like everything doesn't matter. Life or death? Ain't it all the same?

I lost $150 recently. But my feelings wasn't really affected! WTF? Its not $1.50 or $15. $150 mind you. And I treated it like.. "Well, no use crying over spilt milk"... -.-!!

I'M FREAKING MYSELF OUT!!!

Now I sit here in front of the computer thinking about what I'm thinking and what has happened to change my outlook on life. = /

Is it a good thing that I'm free and easy with life? Is it good that I take up this happy, light hearted view in life? Or am I just being complacent with the things that I have now.

I just came up with a new philosophy. Jealousy spurs competition. Thinking again, it seems pretty true. Why does competitors go all out to defeat their rivals? Jealousy. Ego. Pure dumbness. Okay. Maybe not the last one.
But I still believe that jealousy does spur competition.

I love kissing metal. To be specific, a trumpet. Yeah! I just had a weird dream that my parents decided to give me a trumpet! And they were discussing where and when to go buy it. And I was like thinking.. "Huh? Are they serious? Wait.. Do they know how to pick one?" And suddenly.. POOF~! I'm awake.

Ok.. Pretty dumb dream. But it confirms something. I'm thinking about trumpets too much. Oh and.. Too many afternoon naps. X D

Long time no update. This place is rotting. There's no life in here whatsoever.

Ugh. Prelims have started. I've just started studying for the papers. In other words, I'm dead.

I've been to the band room these few days. Miss playing the trumpet. I realised that I sound terrible plus horrible. UGH! So what if I can hit high G ?

What is a trumpeter without a good tone?
A Terrible plus horrible trumpeter.

That's me.

I'm a jack of all trades but a master of none. = / Oh well. I'll just let things take its course..

I feel insignificant. Oh well, I always feel insignificant.
Practiced the pieces for this Sunday's concert on my own just now.. I still am not able to last through the whole repertoire. Got to buck up and get my gears in motion before sunday.

I'm irritated by some people. I'm frustrated with myself.

I feel like a loser. Last friday's performance was a disaster. All my fault. Happily screwing up even the first note that came out of my bell on stage. Sad.