31st December 2008
Wednesday
You say goodbye and I say hello
Every now and then I sit around and look at life pass me by. Then the fact that time is flowing by quickly as well hits me and I start panicking. But such periods of reflection are inarguably beneficial for oneself. Or so I say.
2008 has slipped by, rather quietly, though not that smoothly. Every single event in 2008 left a notch in my soul and, hopefully, stay vivid in my memory. Things only happen once and memories then to fade away pretty quickly.
For now, the most vivid moment in 2008 stays sharp, and looks seemingly like a cross-processed film. Other significant events are stored away, locked in the depths of my memories where I sometimes pull out and relive the moments second for second. One thing I have learnt to do, though not that good at it, is to record videos in my memory and playback as and when I want to. Such as the "Space Shot" ride during my Genting trip.
Much of the things I set off to accomplish during this year has either failed miserably, or I have not gotten anywhere near it at all. Who do I have to blame? Evidently, not enough effort and commitment was put into everything. This is one point to improve on in the coming year.
Consistency is another issue to be addressed. With half the time failing to do what I want to do, and the other half not knowing what to do, I really do have a lot to consider and amend. Life has been pretty docile for me and that might change anytime. I really cannot wait till the last moment before slamming the emergency button and hoping for things to get better.
Hopefully, 2009 will be much less of a roller coaster ride, and more of a constant trek up to the mountain summit.
Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Thursday, December 25, 2008
Lonely Christmas
25th December 2008
Thursday
Where's the magic?
For me, Christmas has sort of lost its magic. What else to expect other than frustration and loneliness from every aspect of life?
The day passed by like every other weekend. The main difference lies in the fact that you have to act cheerful and keep a smile on your face when you meet friends and wish them a merry Christmas. Or even when typing out a post in the blog.
I have had many posts whining about having to act in life, so no more about that, though I would very much like to go on about having to act like someone I am not.
But this Christmas is really pretty awful for me even if it does not show.
Last Christmas, I have zero ideas on how I spent it. The only evidence left over from my blog entries, which as usual, do not contain a summary of the day, shows that I was pretty much whining about everything. Almost like what I am doing now.
At the end of the day, it simply shows that I am not a Christmas person. Well, what would you expect me to say? That I love Christmas, and it just happens to be a slow season this year and next year will be a bomb? It would be nothing more than a string of lies if I said that.
This Christmas, I spent bulk of the day in Azeroth (World of Warcraft), and in the practice studio. The evening was completely taken up by games, first in the school's computer lab, then the LAN shop at Parklane. How exciting can it be? At least it beats moping around at home over some spilt milk.
Thus ends my Christmas post. I hereby wish all readers a blessed festive season.
"Christmas is always a reminder, for those suffering, that life will never be fair with the selfishness in Man. Of course, that is if you have already put in the effort into improving yourself."
-Han Yong
Thursday
Where's the magic?
For me, Christmas has sort of lost its magic. What else to expect other than frustration and loneliness from every aspect of life?
The day passed by like every other weekend. The main difference lies in the fact that you have to act cheerful and keep a smile on your face when you meet friends and wish them a merry Christmas. Or even when typing out a post in the blog.
I have had many posts whining about having to act in life, so no more about that, though I would very much like to go on about having to act like someone I am not.
But this Christmas is really pretty awful for me even if it does not show.
Last Christmas, I have zero ideas on how I spent it. The only evidence left over from my blog entries, which as usual, do not contain a summary of the day, shows that I was pretty much whining about everything. Almost like what I am doing now.
At the end of the day, it simply shows that I am not a Christmas person. Well, what would you expect me to say? That I love Christmas, and it just happens to be a slow season this year and next year will be a bomb? It would be nothing more than a string of lies if I said that.
This Christmas, I spent bulk of the day in Azeroth (World of Warcraft), and in the practice studio. The evening was completely taken up by games, first in the school's computer lab, then the LAN shop at Parklane. How exciting can it be? At least it beats moping around at home over some spilt milk.
Thus ends my Christmas post. I hereby wish all readers a blessed festive season.
"Christmas is always a reminder, for those suffering, that life will never be fair with the selfishness in Man. Of course, that is if you have already put in the effort into improving yourself."
-Han Yong
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
Denial of truth
24th December 2008
Wednesday
In our lifetime, we probably would have certain situations where someone close, or not so close, passes a passing comment that would resurface in your thoughts from time to time. Such comments, or rather, small snippets of advice, usually provides an additional resolve to carry you forward in life. At least it does for me. These small snippets of wise advice may come from the least expected people. Those who give them might not even be aware of the fact that someone else is actually remembering and using it to get past hurdles in life.
But then again, there are also cases where certain little innocuous comments keep reappearing to haunt you. These are the harmful ones who tend to drag down confidence level and to really screw you up when you find the least need for them to be around. The best part is that such comments are passed in jest and without ill intentions.
How can we tell them apart? It turns out that it is almost impossible. One comment in a situation might deliver a different message in another situation. In such cases of life's little irony, the simplest solution would be to flash the finger and just carry on with life.
Advice, commentaries, accusations, feedback, are all part of the perspective from a third person. Meaning, that you get, more often than not, stuff that people just tell you without much consideration to the aftereffects. Much like dropping a pebble into a still pond, you never know how far the ripples will travel. And when you do find out, it will be much too late.
With everything else in life, the best way is to retain your first person bubble, and take each third person observation with an open mind. Once you let yourself get lost in the sea of personalities, chances are you would just be living someone else's life.
Am I living, trying to live my life? Or am I living my life?
Wednesday
In our lifetime, we probably would have certain situations where someone close, or not so close, passes a passing comment that would resurface in your thoughts from time to time. Such comments, or rather, small snippets of advice, usually provides an additional resolve to carry you forward in life. At least it does for me. These small snippets of wise advice may come from the least expected people. Those who give them might not even be aware of the fact that someone else is actually remembering and using it to get past hurdles in life.
But then again, there are also cases where certain little innocuous comments keep reappearing to haunt you. These are the harmful ones who tend to drag down confidence level and to really screw you up when you find the least need for them to be around. The best part is that such comments are passed in jest and without ill intentions.
How can we tell them apart? It turns out that it is almost impossible. One comment in a situation might deliver a different message in another situation. In such cases of life's little irony, the simplest solution would be to flash the finger and just carry on with life.
Advice, commentaries, accusations, feedback, are all part of the perspective from a third person. Meaning, that you get, more often than not, stuff that people just tell you without much consideration to the aftereffects. Much like dropping a pebble into a still pond, you never know how far the ripples will travel. And when you do find out, it will be much too late.
With everything else in life, the best way is to retain your first person bubble, and take each third person observation with an open mind. Once you let yourself get lost in the sea of personalities, chances are you would just be living someone else's life.
Am I living, trying to live my life? Or am I living my life?
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
One step forth, one step back
16th December 2008
Tuesday
Weathered faces lined in pain are soothed beneath the artist's loving hand
How many times does a bird fall before it learns to fly? Too many a time I suppose. And surely there would be one or two doomed ones that fall and break their wings.
This is the umpteen time I got out of one problem only to face another problem. And it is frustrating. Really frustrating, and I do mean those kinds where you really want to take a power drill and start drilling holes into your left palm. Imagine driving a high powered Ferrari on a straight and long stretch of road and getting stopped at every single traffic light every fifty meters. Now take that frustration and increase it fifty fold.
I am burnt out, feeling really useless when I hear anyone else playing their instruments. The one thing I would very much like to do is to grab put on scuba gear and hide in a school of fishes and just concentrate on the sounds underwater.
Tuesday
Weathered faces lined in pain are soothed beneath the artist's loving hand
How many times does a bird fall before it learns to fly? Too many a time I suppose. And surely there would be one or two doomed ones that fall and break their wings.
This is the umpteen time I got out of one problem only to face another problem. And it is frustrating. Really frustrating, and I do mean those kinds where you really want to take a power drill and start drilling holes into your left palm. Imagine driving a high powered Ferrari on a straight and long stretch of road and getting stopped at every single traffic light every fifty meters. Now take that frustration and increase it fifty fold.
I am burnt out, feeling really useless when I hear anyone else playing their instruments. The one thing I would very much like to do is to grab put on scuba gear and hide in a school of fishes and just concentrate on the sounds underwater.
Thursday, December 11, 2008
Raindrops keep falling....
11th December 2008
Thursday
Raindrops keep falling on my...
On days like this, I feel really thankful for being born into a family which can afford a roof over our heads. Whilst other less fortunate people in rather backward societies have to stand with trees as shelter. I watch the rain through the glass panes of the window, taking in the steady pitter-patter like morphine to a drug dependent patient. In crazy rush-hour Singapore, taking a slow day is really a luxury.
'Cause I'm never gonna stop the rain by complainin'
It is pretty quiet in school. The only audible sounds are the brass quintet rehearsing for Christmas busking, a euphonium, and a flute practicing. Ironic how everyone is fighting for rooms during school days, and how the school is half a step away from being a ghost town during holidays. Makes me wonder what everyone is doing.
The most beautiful things in the world is usually free
-Han Yong
Thursday
Raindrops keep falling on my...
On days like this, I feel really thankful for being born into a family which can afford a roof over our heads. Whilst other less fortunate people in rather backward societies have to stand with trees as shelter. I watch the rain through the glass panes of the window, taking in the steady pitter-patter like morphine to a drug dependent patient. In crazy rush-hour Singapore, taking a slow day is really a luxury.
'Cause I'm never gonna stop the rain by complainin'
It is pretty quiet in school. The only audible sounds are the brass quintet rehearsing for Christmas busking, a euphonium, and a flute practicing. Ironic how everyone is fighting for rooms during school days, and how the school is half a step away from being a ghost town during holidays. Makes me wonder what everyone is doing.
The most beautiful things in the world is usually free
-Han Yong
Wednesday, December 10, 2008
Barbershop Quartets
10th December 2008
Wednesday
Why did the chicken cross the road? (Answer at the end of the post)
I am back from Chiang Mai. Actually I have been back for a couple of days. The trip was fun and interesting. But nothing beats the wonderful weather in Singapore. Okay I am just kidding. Who in the right mind would love the warm and humid weather here?
Results from semester 1 examination is out. I pretty much screwed everything up, with a GPA of 2.32. Heck, that's even lower than my worst poly result (i think). And I am so utterly disgusted by it. Especially my Principal Studies results. All that hard work and frustration put in to get a C. Just thinking about it makes me cuss. It is hard getting back on track. But we do have to get back to it sooner or later right? So screw this exams and the next one will be better (hopefully).
[Edit] Okay the virus is still not cleared yet. Meanwhile I'm still hunting for a solution. Anyone good with tech stuff please lend me a hand here.
I must say, Youtube is amazing. Here's what's gotten into me over the past few days. Barbershop quartets.
Say, most of you have heard the amazing trombone quartet version of Stars and Stripes right? here's a vocal one. It is damn good, way better than instrumental versions. Volume's pretty soft, so turn up your speakers before playing the video.
Because it got the wrong road.
-Han Yong
Wednesday
Why did the chicken cross the road? (Answer at the end of the post)
I am back from Chiang Mai. Actually I have been back for a couple of days. The trip was fun and interesting. But nothing beats the wonderful weather in Singapore. Okay I am just kidding. Who in the right mind would love the warm and humid weather here?
Results from semester 1 examination is out. I pretty much screwed everything up, with a GPA of 2.32. Heck, that's even lower than my worst poly result (i think). And I am so utterly disgusted by it. Especially my Principal Studies results. All that hard work and frustration put in to get a C. Just thinking about it makes me cuss. It is hard getting back on track. But we do have to get back to it sooner or later right? So screw this exams and the next one will be better (hopefully).
[Edit] Okay the virus is still not cleared yet. Meanwhile I'm still hunting for a solution. Anyone good with tech stuff please lend me a hand here.
I must say, Youtube is amazing. Here's what's gotten into me over the past few days. Barbershop quartets.
Say, most of you have heard the amazing trombone quartet version of Stars and Stripes right? here's a vocal one. It is damn good, way better than instrumental versions. Volume's pretty soft, so turn up your speakers before playing the video.
Because it got the wrong road.
-Han Yong
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